(Heavy distorted guitar riff with atonal squawks)
Verse 1 (Spoken with a thick Northern Adirondack flyover accent)
Woke up this mornin’, head ringin’ like a church bell on discount day
Dreamt I was back in Merrill, where the lake’s bright as a disco ball on display
My great-grandpappy, rest his soul, settled there in eighteen twenty-one
Whispers of an Indian lead mine, a story never fully outrun
(Chorus – Zappa-esque, sung with manic energy)
Chateaugay Lake, a portal to the bizarre!
Jonathan Bellows with a handlebar moustache like a hairy guitar!
Nathaniel Collins, the guide with a secret smile,
Knows where the caves hide, for a subterranean mile!
(Saxophone solo with a theremin duel)
Verse 2 (Spoken with a spooky Abenaki drawl)
Summers bled green, Indians camped on the sandbar and Indian Point
Like fireflies blinking, till the fall winds blew their point
One day, an Indian Warrior with feathers in his hair
Knocked on my granddad’s door, a chunk of lead to share
(Chorus – Faster tempo, with a cowbell thrown in)
Chateaugay Lake, a vortex of the strange!
Jonathan Bellows with a voice that could rearrange!
Nathaniel Collins, the guide with a knowing wink,
Leads you to the madness, on the very brink!
(Guitar solo with random tempo changes)
Verse 3 (Sung in an operatic style with yodeling interjections)
Nat Collins, born in ’29, a legend of the woods!
Knew every mountain crevice, understood the misunderstoods!
One day, with Peabody (who wore a monocle, quite a sight!)
Stumbled on a steaming fissure, bathed in eerie light!
(Chorus – Slowed down and bluesy)
Chateaugay Lake, a mystery unfolds,
Jonathan Bellows with secrets yet untold.
Nathaniel Collins, the guide with eyes so wise,
Unveils a hidden world, beneath the painted skies.
(Accordion solo with kazoo accompaniment)
Verse 4 (Spoken in a rapid-fire auctioneer voice)
Chester Harding, the painter, immortalized Boone!
Eighteen twenty, his final year, a masterpiece to swoon!
Twenty summers spent at the Lake House, with Nat by his side,
His fame boomed like fireworks, a self-taught wonder, his talent can’t be denied!
(Chorus – Final burst with all instruments at maximum volume)
Chateaugay Lake, a mind-bending trip!
Jonathan Bellows with a polka-dotted lip!
Nathaniel Collins, the guide with a wink and a grin,
The secrets of this lake, never truly end!
(Outro – Fade out with a distorted, psychedelic jam)
What mysteries of Chateaugay Lake haunt you?